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Illustration by Erin Aniker. My First Time is a column and podcast series exploring sexuality, gender, and kink with the wide-eyed curiosity of a virgin.

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We all know your girls for escorts time" is about a lot more than just popping your cherry. From experimenting with kink to just trying something new and wild, everyone experiences thousands of first times in the bedroom—that's how sex stays fun, right? This week, we're talking to Amy Anderson about her experience of dating older men.

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I met my current partner seven years ago, when I was 21 and he was I definitely have a type with guys—much older, long hair, and beards. When I met my partner I thought, Wow.

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We were friends for years before we started dating, because we were both in relationships with other people. But it was really fun and playful and explorative: Broadly speaking, older men are less goal-oriented when it comes to sex.

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Older people have had the time to unpack all the societal stigma that is programmed into sex. I think that specific view of sex is something that younger men.

10 Reasons Why Women Should Date Men In Their 50s | HuffPost

I certainly grew up thinking that sex went a certain way and that it was a very specific thing, and if you deviated from that, you were doing it wrong.

I think a lot of women share that experience.

People will always judge you, whatever you. I like to date guys who like me for me, not for datiing age I am. Now I realize that was wrong, because he was treating me as a trophy, not a person.

Using a younger woman as a status symbol is a datinb red flag. Navigating age and gendered power dynamics can be difficult in age-gap relationships.

My partner and I are very careful that we discuss everything from an equal footing. We have a lot of fun. We go on holiday; we go on trips; we go out.

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We have enough in common to make it work. Aligning values and desires is what matters.

The harder stuff to navigate is power dynamics and the possibility of the eventual ill-health and death of the older partner. I think about the future all the time. Because life does things, and age does things, and people get older and die.

My view on it is that I could meet someone my own age, and they could get cancer or be hit by a bus and die. Life is fragile and unpredictable. Twenty-seven-year-old Amy Anderson says her year-old boyfriend makes a better lover because he's more sexually liberated.

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But not all older boyfriends are created equal, she warns. May 24